Back to top

Pages


China Merchant.
The china merchant wears a red coat with tails, a cravat, and trousers. He has an exaggerated, long nose and bucked teeth. He sits over a table with numerous pieces of china, including wine glasses, vases, mugs, and jugs., Text: With what an intellectual face, / This crockery dealer here we trace -- / Like his china, how he glistens, / When he finds a soul that listens. / Booby, take your wares and glass / Out of sight -- don't be an ass; / If a Valentine you wish, / View yourself in every dish., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Clear the track and let me pass.
The woman's walking dress reveals her legs and her crinoline. "Sonsie" is slang for "comely.", Text: Clear the track and let me pass, / Boots and hoops, / Am I not a sonsie lass, / One who troops? Ho! my coat of lion skin / Never droops-- / Nor my buttons, nor my chin. / With ribbon loops., Cf.1.39., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Clerk.
The clerk wears a coat and trousers. He sits on a tall stool at a tall desk, and his feet hang far from the floor., Text: To count the dollars, cents, and mills, / For that alone you're fit, / Devoid of common decency, / Or any show of wit. / Think you I'd hug a man's effigy, / Or to his love incline? / I'd sooner court a bag of mush, / To be my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Cod-Fish Aristocracy.
The woman wears a gown and holds a fan. Her head is shaped like a cod-fish, and the fins resemble strings on a bonnet. Cod-Fish aristocracy was a derogatory term for New Englanders whose family wealth originated in maritime businesses., Text: You wish to be thought "some" we know, / In truth a very odd wish; / Since people say, not long ago, / Your parents dealt in cod-fish., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Cold Comfort--Ice Cream.
Having fallen while ice skating, a woman sits on the ice with her crinoline and petticoats revealed. She gestures toward a sign which reads "ice cream." The punning text misconstrues her interest in ice cream as a statement regarding her predicament on the ice. The border shows cupids and hearts; one cupid shoots a heart out of a thimble cannon labeled "Love"; another cupid travels with a heart in a hot-air balloon; and another cupid hammers at a cracked heart below a heart on a fishhook labeled "Caught.", Text: You shiver and howl-- to move you dread, / You're game for all deriders, / Your balance gone and your thin legs spread, / Like a pair of drunk dividers. / "I scream!" you shriek in anguish'd tone, / A more summary plan you require; / Take off your skates and stay at home, / Knit stockings in front of the fire., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Cold Water Cure for Bleeding Hearts.
A washerwoman stands next to a bucket of "bleeding hearts" and pins hearts onto a clothes-line. Her dress billows up in the back. Behind her is a tub labeled "cold water" and a container labeled "soft soap." The valentine references the water cure movement. The border features a woman embracing a man; the pair resemble Commedia dell'arte characters. At the bottom is a pack of matches marked "Lucifer's matches.", Text: Ho! all ye lovers pale and wan, / Who of your bleeding hearts complain, / For you my trade I carry on / And from soiled hearts remove each stain. / Come one, come all!-- hearts smoothed and pressed / And safely folded in the Chest., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Colonel.
The colonel wears a green jacket and red pants, and his uniform is neither Union nor Confederate. He wears a disproportionally long sword in a scabbard and stands in front of a writing desk. He has long sideburns and a thick moustache., Text: When perched on your charger on dress parade / You look as brave soldier as ever was made / If you look but as brave when bullets fly / You Country will love you and so will I., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Complacent Officer.
The Union officer stands with his feet crossed and his hand on his hip. He holds one of his mutton chops, which are long and curled., Text: Oh, gallient officer, / With air so complacent, / With whiskers a la mutton chop, / And general [air] so dacent [missing word]-- / I'm sure I could not wed with thee, / For I'd never do my duty; / What could I do the live-long day, / But gaze upon thy beauty?, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Compounder keen of drenching drugs.
The compounder of drugs has a crane's head and is extremely thin. He carries a large red syringe and has a medicine bottle in his pocket., Text: Compounder keen of drenching drugs, / Fly-poison, baneful wash for bugs, / And boluses for rats; / Pills, plasters, rubber for the toes, / And odors to regulate the nose, / And castor oil for cats., Variant of 7.2., "115", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Conceited Woman.
The conceited woman wears a large skirt with furbelows and a crinoline. Her face is obscured by a purple wide-brimmed hat, and her nose is upturned. She extends her left hand., Text: There we see an old ewe, yet more like a ram, / Though a fifty-year old, she's dressed like a lamb / Both toothless and ugly, and snuffy and base, / Yet she tries to look sheepish, and soft in the face. / Dress on, mother Hecate your Stiff Crinoline / Floats flauntingly freely, abroad in the wind, / But the looks you give, and the fashions you wear, / Bids all of good sense and of manners beware., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Conductor.
The smirking conductor wears a green uniform and red cap. The valentine criticizes him for paying too much attention to a woman passenger., Text: O! gallant Conductor, pray don't think us blind, / We saw you conduct her with airs so refined; / Pray alter your conduct, or proceed with care, / Your quite too attentive collecting your fair., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Contemptible Man.
The "contemptible man" wears a blue coat, red waistcoat, yellow trousers, and a black top hat, all of which appear too large for him. His fingers and eyebrows are sharply pointed. He stands by a table where yellow items are for sale (butter?). The text mocks him for his penny-pinching nature., Text: You're really so mean in all you attempt, / That failing, you meet with nought but contempt; / I really believe 'tis your constant endeavor / To make yourself small and meet scorn forever., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Contemptible Woman.
A woman with large, pointed facial features stands at a door holding the doorknob., Text: From all that is lovely, I'm sorry to find, / Both of grace and of mind, you're exempt; / And though to think well, my heart is inclined, / You only can merit contempt., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Convenient Fashion.
The valentine shows a woman entering a carriage and a man standing behind. Her crinoline pulls up her skirt, hitting the man in the head and revealing her legs to him., Text: Go in, my dear-- go it with a rush, / And never mind the hat; / It is not often that I see / So big a leg as that., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Cook.
The cook holds a long-handled frying pan over an oven. She is large and wears an apron., Text: Though in roast, baked, and boiled, you greatly excel, / Add your pies, tarts, and puddings, I greatly admire: / To take you for a wife, you know very well, / Would be "Out of the frying pan into the fire.", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Cooper.
The cooper holds a hammer in his hand above a barrel. Behind him are barrels and tools. He smokes a pipe and wears a top hat., Text: Pretty dear! with face just like a baboon, / And mouth more fit for the ladle than for spoon, / Hammer away, and labor at your task.... / Your empty head is emblem of your cask., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Copperhead.
The Union solider aims a gun towards the viewer. A speech bubble reads "Who goes there?" A yellow snake labeled "copperhead" lays around his feet. Copperhead refers to northern sympathizers with Secession. "Anathema Marantha" is a biblical curse., Text: Of all things whom honorable men despise, / The meanest is the copperhead and traitor, / Whose presence is a libel on our liberties, / And his thoughts a libel on his Creator. / Anathema Marantha! Let him be accursed: / Let him drink of the poison he distils: / Let him be marked of enemies the worst, / That has brought on the Republic all its ills. / The woman would be branded with ever living shame, / Who, for a Valentine, breathed a copperhead's name., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Copperhead.
The man leans forwards and grins. He wears a blue coat and yellow plaid trousers. His hair and mutton chops are curly. Copperhead refers to northern sympathizers with Secession., Text: When, leaving the ranks of honest men, / 'Mid men of politics to snake it, / 'Twas well you chose a Copperhead, / For fear some loyal man should break it., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Coquette.
The coquette is surrounded by four men. One has a hunchback, two have large noses, and the final one is balding. The female figure is larger and more brightly colored than the men. She wear a gown and small cap. The shadowy figure of a dog looks on., Text: Lizard-hearted, sly coquette, / Never pleased but with a set / Of winking fools about your feet, / Swearing your sour breath is sweet. / Casting each one off in turn, / Until at last, for all you burn; / In wrinkles in contempt you'll pine, / And like a lone cat longing whine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Coquette.
The valentine shows a large central female figure, the coquette, and two men standing behind her. She smiles and holds her hands out. The valentine condemns female flirtation and suggests that the outcome will not be marriage., Text: Vain, silly coquette, whose only employ / Is fond loving hearts to offend; / Beware, or ere long the enjoyment will cloy, / And you'll die an old maid in the end., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Corkscrew Tongue.
The woman with the "corkscrew tongue" is shown wearing a yellow and red gown, bonnet., Text: Beware of woman, both old and young; / I once had a wife with a corkscrew tongue. / Whenever we disagreed, you see, / she run the 'unruly member' through me, / Cutting me up, stomach and heart -- / 'Twas an awful BORE, and we had to part. / 'Twas an ex-screw-tiating divorce, / But the corkscrew left me no other course. / I send you this, as a warning, in time / To unscrew your long tongue, if you'd have a Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Counter Jumper.
The counter jumper sits at desk and writes in a ledger. Ledgers marked "Cash" and "day" are on a shelf above his desk, and some of the letters face the wrong direction. The sender mocks the recipient's inflated sense of self-worth as a ladies' man., Text: Behind the counter, like an ape, / You grin and measure off your tape, / And put on winning ways, / While the ladies laugh aside, / At your folly and your pride, / And scorn your silly praise. / You think that every lady is inclin'd / To take you for her Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Country Bumpkin.
A short and stout country bumpkin smiles and carries a pitchfork. The sender rejects the recipient's romantic advances because of his occupation., Text: My country chuck, go turn your hay, / And do not put me in a splutter, / By asking me to go away / With you, to make your cheese and butter., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Country Clown.
The country clown holds a rake and stands on grass. He smiles widely and wears a wide-brimmed hat, trousers, shirt, and vest. The text suggests that he speaks a provincial dialect, saying "ye" for "you.", Text: Devoid of breeding, arts, and graces, / Among the greens I'm sure your place is; / To come to town would be a pity, / For I am sure some horse would eat ye., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Country Girl.
The country girl wears a low-cut gown, and she holds a basket of fruit in her lap and pares a piece of fruit. The valentine suggests that she is fickle and possibly sexually promiscuous., Text: Now's the time, sweet girl, for paring, / But, like your onions, I'm a pun-gent; / Ah! I fear you're too ensnaring, / And not content would be with one gent., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Country Pumbkin.
The "country pumbkin" is shown from the waist up. He carries a green pumpkin (or other squash) and wears a green top hat, blue jacket, and red vest. His mouth is open, either yawning or yelling. "Pumpkin" is a derogatory term for an important person., Text: Oh you poor corn-fed country Elf, / Behold the picture of thyself. / Hither come to make love's vows, / Better stay at home and feed your cows. / A city life will never do / For a stupid Hound like you, / Go hoe your corn and feed your swine / And keep your pumpkin for a Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Country Storekeeper.
The storekeeper daintly holds a napkin in one hand and pours coffee on the table with the other. He is thin, has thick catfish-like whiskers, and opens his mouth either yelling or shocked. A vase and a book are on the counter in front of him. A "codfish" was a wealthy New Englander whose family fortune originated in maritime business., Text: Magnificent merchant! you much I admire, / O! you prince of the counter -- you odd fish! / No doubt in the future I'll see you aspire / To a place 'mong the regular codfish., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Crack-Brained Fellow.
The valentine shows a man in profile smiling. His beak-like nose and jacket with tails make him resemble a bird., Text: You don't look so very unruly; / In fact, you're as tame as a goose: / You're all you're cracked up to be, truly, / And your wits are lying 'round loose., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Crusty Old Fellow.
The crusty fellow of the valentine stands facing a flight of stairs. He holds an umbrella and wears a hat. He grimaces and has large, pointed features., Text: You're always full of dumps and vapors, / And playing off your crabbed capers; / I'd die a maiden old and fusty, / Ere I would wed a man so crusty., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Cry Baby.
The valentine shows an image of a small child in a pink frock with a yellow collar crying with its hands clenched., Text: Pray dry your eyes my pretty child, / Be cheerful and then maybe, / Next time I pass this way I'll bring, / Some candy for the Baby., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Darling Duck.
The valentine depicts a woman with the body of a duck., Text: Take my advice my little duck, / And quick a husband take, / For it is so, as you well know, / Each duck must have its drake., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Daughter of the D--.
The "daughter of the D---" holds a broom in one hand and a set of large tongs in the other. Her hair is wiry, and her face is pointed with lizard-like tongue and sharp teeth., Text: If all God e'er made was good, / Some things like you we find most evil; / And we must think, at least we should, / That you're the offspring of the D----., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Dead drunk, and sleeping on the ground.
The valentine depicts a Union soldier passed out on the ground with a gun and a bottle in front of him. He has white hair and noticeable warts. "Zoo-Zoo" refers to the Zouave regiments in the Civil War., Text: Dead drunk, and sleeping on the ground, / Thus, Zoo-Zoo, daily you are found; / You would your country sell or buy, / For just one horn of strong old rye. / Go hang yourself upon yon tree, / You're not the Valentine for me., "522", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Dear Madam, I must vainly try.
The valentine shows a tall woman in the foreground and a shorter woman in the background., Text: Dear Madam, I must vainly try / From your lengthened form to fly -- / To share that tender heart I pine / And fly to thee, my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Dear, simpering, fascinating Miss.
A woman wears a tiered skirt of ruffles of decreasing size that tapers at the ankles. The style of skirt caused women to lean forward in a Grecian Bend; the Grecian Bend style of bustle became popular after 1869., Text: Dear, simpering, fascinating Miss, / It struck me that you looked like this / When last I met you on the street, / In skirt with Grecian Bend replete; / The sight which you present / Would throw the warmest lover off the scent., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

The Dentist.
The valentine shows two men. One reclines with his mouth open, and the other stands above him about to pull a tooth out. Both men have disheveled hair and pained expressions., Text: A Dentist here makes teeth of bone / For those whom Fate has left without; / And finds provision for his own / By pulling other people's out., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

A Deserter.
A soldier runs. His jacket is red, but his belt buckle, marked "US," suggests that he is a Union soldier., Text: The man who would desert his country in her need, / Is so much lost to honor, honesty, and shame, / That after death his corpse should ravens feed -- / That all the world should e'en forget his name., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Devil of a Woman.
The woman carrying a small red parisol wears a gown with large yellow skirt with furbelows., Text: Yes, there she is; and it's no use talking, / I've seen the Devil in the street walking; / I thought they were chain'd in bonds superhuman, / This is hooped up just like a woman., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Devil's Own--A Two-Faced Woman.
The valentine depicts a woman with two faces. One smiles, has regular features, and holds out her hand. The other rages, has pointed features, and shakes her fist., Text: So, so, here we have you unmasked, / The truth is too plain to be asked; / Full of scandal, and always lying, / Constantly your tongue is flying; / You backbite the very best of friends, / And injure all to make your ends., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Devoid of useless crinoline.
A woman wears a dress with a narrow skirt and train and neither a crinoline nor a bustle. "Rag and tag" refers to the damage done to the trains of the skirts from walking in the streets. Crinolines were out of fashion in the late 1860s, and then bustles were in vogue. Bustles went out of fashion between 1876 and 1883., Text: Devoid of useless crinoline. / She moves majestic as a queen, / In sweeping robe and drooping bonnet / With many a rag and tag upon it., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

Pages