McAllister Comic Valentines

In both the United States and England, the market for comic valentines rivaled that for sentimental valentines, with their sales numbers about equal in the 1840s and 1850s. Sentimental valentines were more expensive, ranging in price from twenty-five cents to thirty dollars. A single comic valentine cost about a penny, hence their other nickname "penny dreadfuls." "Dreadful" is an appropriate term, but "crude," both in content and printing, is perhaps more accurate. Many were printed from wood blocks, with the color added by hand (often with stencils). The later examples were reproduced lithographically, but imitated the look of woodcuts. Sometimes the same image was used more than once with different doggerel verse. The recipients typically threw them away, so few survive. Bibliographically, they are challenging because they rarely list the artists' or publishers' names or the date of publication. The illustration technique is not always obvious, even with magnification. Working under the NEH-funded McAllister Project, Linda Wisniewski scanned the valentines. During a 2006 internship funded by the Fels Foundation, Elizabeth Donaldson created the records for the collection. Thanks to Linda and Betsy, digital versions of these remarkable pieces of ephemera are available here for further study.

Collection Metadata

Title: McAllister Comic Valentines
Creator: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896
Subject: Library Company of Philadelphia, Valentines, Valentines -- Collectors and collecting.
Description: In both the United States and England, the market for comic valentines rivaled that for sentimental valentines, with their sales numbers about equal in the 1840s and 1850s. Sentimental valentines were more expensive, ranging in price from twenty-five cents to thirty dollars. A single comic valentine cost about a penny, hence their other nickname "penny dreadfuls." "Dreadful" is an appropriate term, but "crude," both in content and printing, is perhaps more accurate. Many were printed from wood blocks, with the color added by hand (often with stencils). The later examples were reproduced lithographically, but imitated the look of woodcuts. Sometimes the same image was used more than once with different doggerel verse. The recipients typically threw them away, so few survive. Bibliographically, they are challenging because they rarely list the artists' or publishers' names or the date of publication. The illustration technique is not always obvious, even with magnification. Working under the NEH-funded McAllister Project, Linda Wisniewski scanned the valentines. During a 2006 internship funded by the Fels Foundation, Elizabeth Donaldson created the records for the collection. Thanks to Linda and Betsy, digital versions of these remarkable pieces of ephemera are available here for further study.
Date: 1840-1880?
Format: Arranged alphabetically by title or first line.
Identifier: Islandora:MCAV1, The Library Company of Philadelphia, McAllister Collection, Comic Valentines.

Pages

: Lazy Man.; A man lies in bed. His arms are up, his feet hang over the bed's edge, and his mouth is open. A chamber pot is visible under the bed., Text: At ten o'clock, you rub your eye's, / And slowly from your warm bed creep, / Or, drowsy asking what's o'clock? / Turn on the other side and sleep., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Lazy Woman.; A woman stands next to her bed and holds up a blanket. Her low-cut gown reveals part of her breasts, and her crinoline tilts back to reveal her petticoats. The sender rejects the recipient, and the valentine connects lazy women with immodesty., Text: Crawling out at ten o'clock, / Hurry girl, put on your frock / You're a sleepy head I see, / So you'll never do for me., Cf. Valentine 3.39., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Leader of the Fashion.; The valentine shows a woman wearing a crown, gown, and holding a parasol. A young man holds the train of her coat. The valentine mocks the woman's too-slender stature and excessively large crinoline., Text: A skeleton in figure / You still are bound to shine, / The great among the greatest / In size of Crinoline., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Light Cavalryman.; The cavalryman sits on a much smaller horse and holds his sword out in front of him. The valentine mocks his gluttony., Text: With sword just like a carving knife / As I'm a living sinner / You look just like a hungry man / A charging on good dinner., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Listener.; The listener holds his ear to a keyhole. A woman on a staircase above him throws a vase of flowers., Text: You are one of those mean, sneaking cusses, / That are always getting people into musses; / Hated by women and despised by man. / You make yourself an ass when'er you can, / You're always trying to get hear some wondrous thing, / That some one's reputation you may sting, / Any girl of sense, with feeling fine, / Would ever scorn to be your Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Literary Man.; The literary man sits at a table. His nose is dark (from drinking?) and he cradles his head with a hand holding a quill. In one corner of the table is a spike with papers through it (i.e., bills?) and on the other corner is a book titled Webster (i.e., Webster's Dictionary?). His trashcan is full, and the valentine suggests that it is difficult for him to write and what he does write is of low quality., Text: With slipshod feet, and coat with elbows out, / You daily sit, and with your scribbling quill, / Indite strange tales and trashy stuff, with which / Poor idle maids their simple minds may fill., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Literary Woman.; The literary woman sits at a table. She writes with a quill, and with her other hand she cradles her head, her elbow resting on a book. The trashcan is filled with yellow pieces of paper. "Blue stocking" is a term for women intellectuals that was often derogatory. The valentines criticizes women writers for lacking sufficient maternal desires and characterizes them as frightening and unattractive. Cf. Diogenes, hys lantern, v. 2 (1852), p. 128., Text: If there e'er was a woman that frightened me quite, / A Blue-stocking 'twould be, who had talent to write, / Who'd much rather spend her time writing a yarn, / Than teaching her children, their stockings to darn., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Little dandy, don't suppose.; The valentine shows a man in a top hat and tails standing at a counter marked "Tailor." The valentine suggests that the dandy should amend his behavior in order to attract women., Text: Little dandy, don't suppose, / Any girl will favor / You, just for your suit of clothes, / Try--suitable behavior., "501", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Loathsome Creature.; A woman with pox marks on her face wears a ball gown. The valentine possibly references sexually transmitted diseases., Text: The marks of every passion base / You plainly bear upon your face / Distorted, vile in every feature, / Indeed you are a loathsome creature., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Long Ear'd Man.; A man has enlarged, bat-like ears, and he eavesdrops from behind a partially opened door. The valentine condemns the recipient's eavesdropping. "Little pitchers have big ears" is a colloquialism that means that children are listening., Text: What is it makes the people cry, / Whenever you may be near by, / And say be sure he does not hear, / For little pitchers have big ears., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Long Shanks.; A tall, thin women holds a fan. "Long shanks" is slang for "long legs," and the valentine mocks the recipient's height., Text: At length my love appears a-long, / So long I do aver; / Her passion towers --and I'd be wrong / Should I a-spire like her., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Long Shanks.; "Long shanks" is slang for "long legs," and the valentine mocks the recipient for his tall stature. "Barnum" refers to P.T. Barnum, the circus founder., Text: Your little bullet head, and legs so very long / Remind me very strongly of a pair of tongs; / Your shape's so very odd, you really make me laugh; / I think if Barnum had you, he would call you the Giraffe., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Long Tongued Woman.; A woman's very long tongue encircles her body. It reads: "You ought to hear all I've got to say! You'd open your eyes!" The valentine satirizes women who gossip., Text: Of all the evils flesh is heir to, / A long tongued woman is the worst to swear to; / What with scandal and story, and malice and wrong, / She keeps the lie moving all the year long. / Never so happy as when her words wound-- / Never so unhappy as when the truth is found: / May my fate ne'er be cursed by such a tongue as thine! / I'd rather have a blast furnace to be my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Look Out for the Rope.; A man runs away from a noose. His hat has fallen off. The sender urges the recipient to avoid marriage and compares marriage, or "Hymen's knot," to death by hanging., Text: Of Hymen's knot you seem afraid, / Because it is so tightly made, / Then run away before you rue it, / For once 'tis tied you can't undo it., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Lounger.; The valentine shows a man with a waxed moustache, glasses, and a top hat. He stands in front of a man and woman. The valentine mocks the lounger for his unattractive idleness, superficial criticism of others, and transparent attempts to be near women., Text: Lounger! ambling 'round the places / Where the ladies congregate, / Critic of their forms and faces; / By them despised, you silly pate., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Love Sick Fellow.; A man holds a woman's hand and kneels before her. His mouth is open, and he holds his hand to his heart. She turns away and smirks. The valentine suggests that he falls in love with any woman he meets., Text: Poor fellow, I pity you, sad is your case, / And, alas! you are weak in your knees; / Whenever you see the merino and lace, / How you wriggle as if you had fleas., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Lover of the Beaux.; The wide-eyed woman grins and wears a bonnet, gown, and coat. The valentine criticizes young women who show affection for too many men too frequently. The valentine possibly connects her enthusiasm with promiscuity., Text: I never like to see a pretty miss / Love everything she meets with breeches on; / And thinks herself possessed of every bliss, / To sport with each new beau she pitches on., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Lovesick Man.; A crying man holds a handkerchief and a bottle of gin. The valentine mockingly urges the rejected man to drink in order to feel better., Text: Poor lovesick mortal, disappointed! / The gal would not the bargain close; / But you'll gain at the bar appointed / The balm to heal the woes you nose., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Machinist.; The machinist holds a hammer and pushes against a brace., Text: In the shop there's none so smart as you / At mending a boiler or making a screw. / Where is your means of supporting a wife, / And supplying her wants throughout her life? / Your wages are small, every one knows / The principal part to the port-house goes! / Faint hope to gain a woman's heart, / By one so well known as thou art., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Made Up Miss.; A woman wears a gown that reveals her long feet and ankles. She holds a fan., Text: What though in silks and lace you shine, / And though with care are painted! / I never wish'd to make you mine, / Since first we were acquainted!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: "Maid of Grease" how fat you look.; A woman cook stands in front of a stove and holds the lid of a pot. A policeman, or "Bobby," stands behind her and says, "Pretty cookery.", Text: "Maid of Grease" how fat you, / The plainest surely of plain Cook; / To try your charms on me's no use / For you shall never cook any Goose. / Doubtless you may think it nobby / To win the notice of some 'Bobby;' / But value not his Cupboard love, / Who from cook to cook doth rove; / Lose your place and money, you / Will find you've lost your Bobby too., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Maiden Aunt.; The maiden aunt has masculine features and wears a bonnet and eyeglasses. A cat sits next to her, and a barrel labeled "vinegar" and a jar labeled "pickles" are nearby., Text: You dear old soul! Every day you grow old, / And your face gives comfort to the vinegar jug; / Your virtues are kept like pickles, I'm told. / Bottled up in a bosm nobody can hug; / If in glory hereafter your face becomes divine, / What a miracle must be wrought, O Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Making Soldiers "Breeches"; The valentine depicts a woman sewing a pair of breeches with a pile of completed breeches next to her. The border features a woman embracing a man; the pair resemble Commedia dell'arte characters. At the bottom is a pack of matches marked "Lucifer's matches.", Text: Hard is thy lot, my honey dear / On soldier's pantaloons aye working, / And yet this thought is so funny, dear, / Within my wicked mind is lurking / Far fitter you than cannon balls / Breaches to make in fortress walls., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Man Crying.; The valentine depicts a man crying, and the text mocks him for his childishness., Text: Pray do not weep, nor spoil those eyes red, / Don't soil your clothes with those soft drops of brine; / Sure, out of pity, some green girl will you wed, / And nurse you as an infant Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Man Hater (in a Horn).; The valentine shows a woman standing in profile. The sender suggests that the recipient enjoys the company of men despite her assertions otherwise., Text: We often hear you say, you hate the men-- / You mean you hate them out of sight; / For when they're in your company -- Oh! then / Your soul is filled with rapture and delight., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Man of Letters.; The man of letters has a rodent's face and tail. He wears knee-breeches, a coat, and cravat. He holds his top hat and a letter in his hands., Text: In a golden lace and fancy plush, / You look finer than your betters, / And take great airs upon yourself, / Since you've grown a man of letters., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Mantilla from your shoulder falls; A woman in gown with a bustle holds an umbrella and bouquet of flowers. "Three-balls" is slang for a pawnbroker. Bustles became popular after 1869., Text: A Mantilla from your shoulder falls / Just redeemed from the three-balls; / In the street you make a dash, / 'Tis strange how you obtain the cash. / You're too lazy, and fear to work / You dirty, nasty little flirt; / Stay at home-- not gad the street, / And speak to every loafer you meet., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Mason.; The mason holds a trowel and a bottle marked "brick." The text refers to his putting a brick in his hat on Saturday night (slang for getting drunk). The border features a woman embracing a man; the pair resemble Commedia dell'arte characters. At the bottom is a pack of matches marked "Lucifer's matches.", Text: Among the brick the mason revels. / With his trowel and line, his levels and bevels, / He bricks up this, and he bricks up that, / And, on Saturday night, puts a brick in his hat., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Comic Valentines; Comic valentines, very popular in the United States beginning in the early 1840s, are quite different from the lacy, heart-shaped cards that one associates with the holiday today. The cartoons and verses poke fun at various occupations (lawyers, doctors, preachers, butchers, etc.), ethnicities (Black, Irish, German, etc.), human frailties (fat, thin, ugly, nosy, two-faced, etc.), romantic aspirations, habits and pastimes, political activities, and participation in the American Civil War. The Philadelphia collector John A. McAllister assembled the collection and donated it to the Library Company of Philadelphia in 1884., In both the United States and England, the market for comic valentines rivaled that for sentimental valentines, with their sales numbers about equal in the 1840s and 1850s. Sentimental valentines were more expensive, ranging in price from twenty-five cents to thirty dollars. A single comic valentine cost about a penny, hence their other nickname "penny dreadfuls." "Dreadful" is an appropriate term, but "crude," both in content and printing, is perhaps more accurate. Many were printed from wood blocks, with the color added by hand (often with stencils). The later examples were reproduced lithographically, but imitated the look of woodcuts. Sometimes the same image was used more than once with different doggerel verse. The recipients typically threw them away, so few survive. Bibliographically, they are challenging because they rarely list the artists' or publishers' names or the date of publication. The illustration technique is not always obvious, even with magnification. Working under the NEH-funded McAllister Project, Linda Wisniewski scanned the valentines. During a 2006 internship funded by the Fels Foundation, Elizabeth Donaldson created the records for the collection. Thanks to Linda and Betsy, digital versions of these remarkable pieces of ephemera are available here for further study., Provenance: The Comic Valentine collection was donated to The Library Company of Philadelphia in 1884 by John Allister McAllister.

: Melancholy.; A woman sits in a chair and holds a handkerchief., Text: Pray clear thy brow of clouds and care, / And banish Melancholy, / Or you will find when 'tis too late, / That all of it was folly., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Military Bummer.; The military bummer, clad in a red coat and yellow pants, has the head of a bulldog. Three Union soldiers stand behind him on one side; two hold rifles with bayonets, and one is drumming. On the other side, an officer stands in front of a tent. A United States flag flies from a flag pole, on which is mounted a sign which reads "Drummed out of Camp for being a Bummer." A "bummer" is a person who avoids duties., Text: He who fights and runs away, / May live to fight another day; / But you did run with all your might, / You did not stay to see the fight., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Military Hero.; The valentine shows a Union officer holding his sword out of its scabbard. There is a cannon ball near his foot., Text: My valiant gory son of Mars, / The way I love is a sin; / If you want me, the Stripes and Stars / Defend, and then go in and win., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Military Man.; The valentine shows a soldier spearing a cat with a bayonet. Another cat stands on the doorframe., Text: Oh! what a brave heroic man!! indeed it is pity / No other foe is near to charge, but a ferocious kitty! / Your patriotism you should curb, don't let your fury loose, / Perchance, before the battle's over, you'll meet a poor old goose. / You're very brave in times of peace, with bayonet and gun, / But should you see the foe in front, good gracious, how you'd run., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Military Man.; The valentine shows a short Union soldier with a large helmet., Text: You say you'd march through thick and thin, / Through fair or stormy weathers, / But I'm inclined to think we'd find / You all fuss and feathers., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Military Sneak.; The deserter kneels, with a dog in front of him and another dog behind him urinating on him. He holds a tub over his head to protect himself from the poker and the iron which his wife holds., Text: You left the Camp of war and strife, / Expecting quiet with your wife, / But you're assailed, behind, before, / You had better leave for war once more., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: Milk-Man.; The milkman is seated in a horse-drawn cart with a container of milk in it. He pours something into a pitcher, and the text suggests that the milkman sells chalk and water as milk. Croton Lake housed many of the dairies and ice houses that served New York City., Text: Pure milk I sell from Croton-lake, / As any in the land, sirs; / No stub-tail drug to town I take, / The world can see my cans, sirs. / No doubt your milk is good and pure, / And will no babies slaughter; / Just chalk enough to make you sure / 'Twill hide the Croton water., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Milliner.; The milliner wears a ball gown and an exaggeratedly large hat., Text: I am a young Milliner, / Setting my cap, / In hopes it may catch me / Some pretty young chap., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: The Milliner.; The woman wears a bonnet and carries a large hat box. "Cap-a-pie" means "head to foot.", Text: So you've come out armed cap-a-pie, / To try and catch a man, / And this to do you'll spare no beau, / But catch one if you can., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Mischief Maker.; The mischief maker holds an opened envelope and sticks her enlongated nose into it., Text: Sly old peeper, mischief making, / Take care now whose note you're taking; / We've found you out, and so despise you, / And send this warning to advise you., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

: A Mischief Making Woman.; The valentine shows a woman with an enlongated tongue. She holds out her finger in a chiding gesture. The sender condemns the recipient for her gossiping., Text: Hence, babbling, brawling soul of evil, / Hence to thy chosen friend, the devil; / Forever chattering, scandal-raking, / Slanders and lies, and mischief-making, / Go, long tongue, go, most hateful, woman, / Thou disagreeable friend of no man: / Such ugly mugs, I'm sure, as thine, / Will never gain a Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.

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