A man with a hog's head ice skates. He carries a walking stick and wears fashionable clothes, suggesting that he is a dandy. The word "cove" is slang for fellow, and the expression "hog on ice" suggests lack of grace and control. The border features a woman embracing a man; the pair resemble Commedia dell'arte characters. At the bottom is a pack of matches marked "Lucifer's matches.", Text: I love to lie in the shady grove, / In the arms of him whose heart I prize; / Or 'neath the skimm'ring moon to rove, / And gaze into his lustrous eyes. / O'er the frozen pool to glide I love, / With him whose love is past all price; / Get out, Pork-Chops! you're not the cove, / 'Tis not with you, you Hog on Ice!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man wears a bonnet and crinoline over his clothing while he does laundry. The valentine satirizes men who did not fight in the Civil War and characterizes them as cowardly and effeminate., Text: You enlist! not to fight at your dear country's call. / You keep from the field where the brave fight & fall; / A sneak and a coward, and no force or persuasion, / Could make you leave home, but the fact of invasion., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The bar-keeper reaches for coins on the bar, presumably payment for the beer a customer is holding. In the background, two women carrying plates and beverages look on. A clock on the wall indicates that the time is shortly before seven o'clock. The text suggests that bar-keepers steal from their employers., Text: I know a Bar-Keeper for a long time, / And to his honor I shall write this rhyme. / We all know that he does well understand / To make long fingers and a crooked hand; / And so, they say : this is the way the money goes: / A shilling always for myself and six cents for my Boss!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman hikes up her skirt, revealing her crinoline and petticoats. "Ducky" is a term of endearment, and "kiver" is a dialect for "cover." "Timbers" refers to her legs and suggests that they are indelicately large. The sender mocks the recipient for her careless immodesty., Text: Hey ducky dumpling, gazing high, / Parading in your t'others, / We look less high, and there we spy, / 'Till laughing almost smothers. / However cold may be your liver, / Such timbers, ducky, ne'er can shiver. / Especially with, such hoops to kiver., Cf. 4.50., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman carries a tiny parasol and wears a gown with a hoop skirt and furbelows., Text: This, truly, is the age of all things new, / For even women grown, and young maids too, / Believe not now in either Heart or Head, / But in the size to which their hoops may spread., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A wrinkled woman wearing a bonnet sits in a chair. "Caudle" refers to a popular "Punch" magazine character serialized in 1845. The valentine suggests her husband's desire to be absent from his wife is warranted and that he will face violence when he returns., Text: Poor Mr. Caudle has gone to his club -- / A club waits for Caudle at home: / How can he such a dear creature snub? / How wish from her arms e'er to roam?, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector., Provenance: Punch (London, England).
The housemaid looks in the mirror and ties her bonnet. Her crinoline is visible through the skirt she wears, and a broom rests against a bureau. The maid probably wears her mistress's clothing. The valentine satirizes the house maid's vanity., Text: O, my missus! don't I beat her? / Ain't the pink upon me sweeter? / I should sit upon the sophy, / And Missus Jones should make the coffee., Cf. 2.13., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The house-maid blacks a boot in a kitchen, where the tea pot and kettle have faces. "To have one's swing" means "to allow oneself every freedom." The valentine possibly accuses the maid of having more energy for playing with sweethearts than for her work., Text: Dirty, ugly, vulgar, pert, / So begrimed with grease and dirt, / I vow that I should afraid of, / Seeing what that MAID is MADE of / Tho' call'd MAID OF ALL WORK! they / Say you're often MADE OF PLAY. / And when sweethearts you've your swing / The MAID is quite a different thing., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
Three men in uniform carry guns. The first and last men are the same height, and the middle man is much taller and thinner. "Hard tack" was a hard bread used by sailors and soldiers. "Jeff" refers to Jefferson Davis., Text: No doubt you fare rough on salt beef and hard tack, / But that is much better than a ball in the back; / So march to the conflict o'er valley and hill, / And if you meet Jeff, just give him a pill., Variant of Valentine 1.24., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man leans on a crunch and a walking stick. He wears a hat that says "D.B. Exempt." D.B. stands for "dead beat," a slang term for men who faked injuries or illness to avoid duty., Text: How suddenly, dear sir, you stopped your talk of war and glory, / When you thought a draft was to take place. But it's the same old story; / A dog that's always barking, they say will never bite, / So with one who talks of fighting, he's the last one to go fight. / There's a very apt old saying, and 'twill well apply to you, / That a man can't be a patriot, and be a coward too., "528", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A frowning woman casts a shadow that resembles the Devil., Text: No meek exterior shall hide / The Pharisaic soul of pride: / Hypocrite -- turn thine eyes within, / Nor longer look abroad for sin., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman wears a narrrow-skirted gown, cape, ermine muff, and bonnet. The sender suggests that he remembers the recipient negatively. A "fancy fair" was a fundraising event at which ornaments and articles of fancy were sold for charitable purposes., Text: I met her at a Fancy Fair -- / Would I had never ventured there! / Her image doth my mind possess, / But not with fancy fair, I guess!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A soldier rides a small horse and holds out his sword. He has white mutton chops and wrinkles. The text suggests that although he can conduct himself in business ("exact a charge"), he is a poor horseman., Text: I see your feet are mighty large, / Your nose is somewhat larger; / And though you can exact a charge / You cannot mind a charger. / Your happy Valentine I ne'er can be, / So from my presence you will please to flee., "512", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The doctor holds a cane in one hand and an umbrella under his other arm. Dangling from his waist is a syringe and a bottle sticks out of his back pocket. He stands before two tombstones, and a skeleton holding a pill bottle dances next to him. Calling him "old Lotion" could refer to the cleansing before medical procedures or to drinking alcoholic beverages. The doctor's cane resembles an enormous pill bottle, and his umbrella resembles an enormous syringe., Text: I very much mistrust, old Lotion, / You're in league with traitor men; / The reason why I've got the notion, / Is -- you more Patriots kill than them., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man holding a trowel lays bricks. The valentine urges the recipient to amend his behavior so that he will not be considered "shabby," or someone who plays mean tricks., Text: If you aint the best of good fellows, / Or constantly up to your tricks, / I think you'll be put down as shabby, / Though you're daily surrounded with Bricks., "31", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman closes the door in the face of a woman caller., Text: Though nought in face or form you're needing, / Nor none more handsome ever was, / You're ugly still, through lack of breeding; / For "pretty is as pretty does.", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man smokes a cigar and holds a glass. He wears curled, elfin shoes. The word "refreshments" appears on the wall behind him., Text: I'm thinking e'er the day is o'er, / You will slip up on ale and wine; / Alas! if you should break your head, / You'd break my heart, dear Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier runs admidst cannon balls. His cap has come off his head., Text: In every army, great and small, / There is a set of patent blowers, / Who of the work make out to shirk all, / And of their valiant deeds are crowers. / But let a battle once commence, / Away they travel for some tree or fence; / You find their brains too soon are addled, / And you've but to see that they've skedaddled., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a fashionably dressed man who grins and holds his hand to his mouth., Text: My innocent young man, My pretty little fellow, / You'll never catch a wife. You are too soft and [mellow?]., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a man looking through a key hole. The text threatens the recipient with violence if he continues spying on and meddling in his neighbors' matters., Text: Poking in your nose where ere you can, / You are a mischievous meddling stupid man; / Who minds his neighbours business not his own / May one day have a broken head to moan., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The Irish woman holds a broom, smokes a pipe, and stands by a pig. "Cutty" refers to a short clay pipe, and "broth of a boy" is an Irish colloquialism for a good young man., Text: Arrah, Bridget, Och! hone! bonny Ireland's joy. / Is it you wud be wanting 'A broth of a boy;' / Jist take my advice, stay at home, tend your pigs, / Lilt your songs, smoke yer cutty, and dance yer gay jigs., Variant of 5.21., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The Irish woman holds a broom, smokes a pipe, and stands by a pig. She wears a pink and yellow dress. Cutty refers to a short clay pipe, and "broth of a boy" is an Irish colloquialism for a good young man., Text: Arrah, Bridget, Och! hone! bonny Ireland's joy. / Is it you wud be wanting 'A broth of a boy;' / Jist take my advice, stay at home, tend your pigs, / Lilt your songs, smoke yer cutty, and dance yer gay jigs., Variant of 5.22., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine satirizes the Irish for drinking, violence, and Catholicism. The Irishman holds his fists up, carries a pipe, and wears knee-breeches., Text: Arrah! paddy, my darlint, wid a big stick, / Are you after a row with Dennis or Mick? / Or, perhaps, a Know-Nothing you'd like to spy, / I'm sure if you find him he'll blacken your eye! / And at a wake you're sure to get tight. / In the street you're a nuisance, with a nasty old pipe., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The Irishman has copious facial hair, smokes a pipe, and wears knee-breeches. He stands in front of another man and a ship. The "Know Nothings" were an anti-Catholic and anti-immigrant group, and the valentine mocks the Irishman for knowing so little that he would join a group that opposes him., Text: It's Paddy from Cork I am; sure you'll be knowin' me; / And I'm jist over, good manners to tache: / Faith, I'm a know-nothing, and soon I'll be showin' ye / How to git into office, and stick like a lache., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine depicts a man crouching down with his hand near his face. His shadow resembles a monkey. The text references the theory of evolution presented by Charles Darwin in his On the origin of species (1859)., Text: It is believed some men among, / That all us folks from monkey sprung, / But until first I saw your face, / I did not think such was the case, / Yet then I thought it might be true-- / That is, my friend, regarding you., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector., Provenance: Magnus, Charles.
A man pulls back a curtain and holds his head. Behind him is a bureau with a mirror on it. The valentine condemns the jealous man for his incursions into privacy. "Dog's death" is slang for a terrible death, which the sender suggests the recipient deserves instead of a Valentine., Text: You selfish, vile, suspicious, jealous ape-- / You green-eyed monster in the human shape, / You fancy, things to others, thoughts unkown, / And paint all hearts as foul as is your own. / You sneak and watch, and like a fool you rave, / To all a torment, to yourself a slave; / A hangman's cord your ugly neck should twine, / And thus a dog's death be your Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine depicts a stout woman with a hooked nose holding three dresses in her arms. "Old Clothes" is written behind her. The border features a woman embracing a man; the pair resemble Commedia dell'arte characters. At the bottom is a pack of matches marked "Lucifer's matches.", Text: My stout Jerusalem artichoke / I greet you with a hearty joke / Because you've cash to lend me when I'm low. / My mind completely rapt it is / Your nose so well adapted is / For snuffing up a bargain of "Old clo'"!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine depicts a man in a sailor's uniform holding a glass in one hand and a "greenback," or a paper dollar bill, in the other. The sender rejects the recipient because of his promiscuity and drinking, which it connects with his love of money, specifically paper currency., Text: Loves nothing as well as a good greenback / Except it be his grog: / And the first he'll waste on the sauciest back, / On the second get drunk as a hog / Alack, Jolly Jack! / Why can't you leave off both women and wine? / Then I'd give you a kiss full of true love's bliss, / And ever call you my own Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The old maid wears a yellow and red ball gown with lace gloves. She holds up her skirt to dance. She has numerous wrinkles., Text: Of all the olds maids that ever I knew, / There never was one half so jolly as you; / A mistake there has been, I am much afraid, / You ne'er were intended to be an old maid., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The woman wears a dress with a large skirt and holds two bags. Behind her a man carries a trunk and a pile of boxes stands nearby. "Shin" means either to walk quickly, suggesting that the woman made numerous brief social calls after going shopping, or to borrow money, suggesting that she needed to make her purchases on credit., Text: Just dropt in -- can't stay a minute; / Got to visit all creation -- / Brought a few things -- had to shin it; / Come to make a visit-ation!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a woman (possibly a landlady) holding a large key and looking through a large keyhole. A sign behind her reads: "Lodgings Cheap & nasty." The valentine criticizes those who invade privacy through spying and associates this behavior with proprietors and lodgers at cheap lodgings., Text: The key to many a tale profound / Of strange intrigues and artful dodgings, / Is in the Keyhole to be found -- / As all should know who live in lodgings., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a man falling over a woman's hoop skirt. The skirt billows up, revealing her legs. The valentine mocks the crinoline fashion for causing accidents. "Pegs" refers to men's legs., Text: The ladies' hoops do dreadful slaughter. / They often cause the chaps to lose their pegs; / And as often quite the girls to show their legs, / And make a world of sport and laughter., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The man wears a blue Union coat with tails and a top hat that he tips forward; his clothing matches Union uniforms in color but not style. He holds a large rifle with a bayonet. The sender suggests that the recipient uses false stories of military glory to attract a wife., Text: Ladies, I learned to bow this way / A dodging rebel swells; / I am a soldier brave and gay, / A favorite with the belles, / If you're for Union-- 'to a man.' / Why, we'll enlist, as soon as we can., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows the fashionably dressed ladies man with a woman on each arm. He is able to attract women's attention, but the valentine suggest that this attention effeminizes him, as actions like holding shawls and flirting fans are feminine., Text: At church or concert, ball or rout, / You're always sure to be about / To hold a shawl or flirt a fan; / My pretty little "ladies man.", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman sews a cap. She has an enlarged nose and a moustache and sits at a table with men's caps on it. The caps' blue color may indicate that they are for Union soldiers., Text: Dainty damsel, time ne'er lingers, / On those very active fingers, / Other females, you make charming! / Make yourself, then, less alarming! / As it is, -- I don't incline, / To pick you for a Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The woman wears an equestrian outfit, including a hat, high-necked blouse, and gloves. She holds a horse whip. A "hobby horse" is a child's toy, and it implies that her horsemanship is poor., Text: Each being has its "hobby," / Some better and some worse; / And you are no exception, / Yours is a hobby horse., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The lady of the house wears a fashionable gown and holds her head at a haughty angle. Behind her, another woman washes clothing in a large tub. The woman at the washtub is probably the employee of the lady of the house. The valentine mocks the woman's social pretensions as unjustifiable given her role as someone who minds a stand (i.e., works in a small commercial enterprise)., Text: The lady of the house, so grand, / With head stuck up, and airs refin'd, / She quite forgets that little stand, / Which all day long she had to mind., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a couple kissing. The clock on the wall indicates that it's one o'clock, and a candle burns nearby. His receding hairline and her staid demeanor suggest that they are older than the norm for courtship. Thus, the late courtship is literally late-at-night and possibly an object of ridicule given their ages., Text: As you daintly sip the dews from her lips, / Both time and the hours scorning, / You sit all night in gay delight, / And don't go home 'till morning., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The laundry woman has a runny nose, holds a basket of clothing, and stands in front of a clothes line. "Stone blue" refers to the blue dye laundry women used on clothing., Text: With aspect STARCH and nose STONE BLUE, / My Laundry Maid who would love you. / Or dare to meddle with your clothes, / Or come too near that dripping nose, / So PERSERVERING it ne'er stops / But keeps on RUNNING 'till it DROPS, / You're one of those sort of women / I would not have get up my linen., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The lawyer has a long nose and a bald spot on top of his head. He holds a piece of paper marked "Bill of." The sender rejects the recipient's marriage proposal., Text: In Hymen's Court you've filed your plea, / In suit on your behalf of me, / But be it known to your vexation, / That No is my fixed declaration., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man lies in bed. His arms are up, his feet hang over the bed's edge, and his mouth is open. A chamber pot is visible under the bed., Text: At ten o'clock, you rub your eye's, / And slowly from your warm bed creep, / Or, drowsy asking what's o'clock? / Turn on the other side and sleep., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman stands next to her bed and holds up a blanket. Her low-cut gown reveals part of her breasts, and her crinoline tilts back to reveal her petticoats. The sender rejects the recipient, and the valentine connects lazy women with immodesty., Text: Crawling out at ten o'clock, / Hurry girl, put on your frock / You're a sleepy head I see, / So you'll never do for me., Cf. Valentine 3.39., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a woman wearing a crown, gown, and holding a parasol. A young man holds the train of her coat. The valentine mocks the woman's too-slender stature and excessively large crinoline., Text: A skeleton in figure / You still are bound to shine, / The great among the greatest / In size of Crinoline., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The cavalryman sits on a much smaller horse and holds his sword out in front of him. The valentine mocks his gluttony., Text: With sword just like a carving knife / As I'm a living sinner / You look just like a hungry man / A charging on good dinner., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The listener holds his ear to a keyhole. A woman on a staircase above him throws a vase of flowers., Text: You are one of those mean, sneaking cusses, / That are always getting people into musses; / Hated by women and despised by man. / You make yourself an ass when'er you can, / You're always trying to get hear some wondrous thing, / That some one's reputation you may sting, / Any girl of sense, with feeling fine, / Would ever scorn to be your Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The literary man sits at a table. His nose is dark (from drinking?) and he cradles his head with a hand holding a quill. In one corner of the table is a spike with papers through it (i.e., bills?) and on the other corner is a book titled Webster (i.e., Webster's Dictionary?). His trashcan is full, and the valentine suggests that it is difficult for him to write and what he does write is of low quality., Text: With slipshod feet, and coat with elbows out, / You daily sit, and with your scribbling quill, / Indite strange tales and trashy stuff, with which / Poor idle maids their simple minds may fill., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The literary woman sits at a table. She writes with a quill, and with her other hand she cradles her head, her elbow resting on a book. The trashcan is filled with yellow pieces of paper. "Blue stocking" is a term for women intellectuals that was often derogatory. The valentines criticizes women writers for lacking sufficient maternal desires and characterizes them as frightening and unattractive. Cf. Diogenes, hys lantern, v. 2 (1852), p. 128., Text: If there e'er was a woman that frightened me quite, / A Blue-stocking 'twould be, who had talent to write, / Who'd much rather spend her time writing a yarn, / Than teaching her children, their stockings to darn., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a man in a top hat and tails standing at a counter marked "Tailor." The valentine suggests that the dandy should amend his behavior in order to attract women., Text: Little dandy, don't suppose, / Any girl will favor / You, just for your suit of clothes, / Try--suitable behavior., "501", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman with pox marks on her face wears a ball gown. The valentine possibly references sexually transmitted diseases., Text: The marks of every passion base / You plainly bear upon your face / Distorted, vile in every feature, / Indeed you are a loathsome creature., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man has enlarged, bat-like ears, and he eavesdrops from behind a partially opened door. The valentine condemns the recipient's eavesdropping. "Little pitchers have big ears" is a colloquialism that means that children are listening., Text: What is it makes the people cry, / Whenever you may be near by, / And say be sure he does not hear, / For little pitchers have big ears., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
