The valentine depicts the bust of a man with rounded features and curly hair. He wears a green coat and necktie. His forehead is labeled "impudence", and he sucks air out of a yellow bag labeled "bag of wind.", Text: Some are pinched the wind to raise, / But you've enough to blow your praise, / While such a bag of wind you share, / You cannot die for want of air., Cf. 1.28., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man carries a walking stick and wears a monocle. In the text, "vane" means a constantly changing person., Text: To point how airs of folly blow, / The vain man is indeed a vane: / What vein of yours, pray, can you show / Better than ours, man made in vain?, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The counter jumper sits at desk and writes in a ledger. Ledgers marked "Cash" and "day" are on a shelf above his desk, and some of the letters face the wrong direction. The sender mocks the recipient's inflated sense of self-worth as a ladies' man., Text: Behind the counter, like an ape, / You grin and measure off your tape, / And put on winning ways, / While the ladies laugh aside, / At your folly and your pride, / And scorn your silly praise. / You think that every lady is inclin'd / To take you for her Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The image depicts a man with his forehead labeled "impudence." He wears a necktie, a jacket with tales, and slim trousers. He sucks air out of a yellow bag labeled "gas.", Text: Some are pinched the wind to raise, / But you've enough to blow your praise; / While such a bag of wind you share, / You cannot die for want of air., Cf. 1.29., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman stands in profile. She wears a bonnet and a dress with a bustle. The valentine criticizes the recipient's artifice and pretensions. Bustles became popular after 1869., Text: No husband you will get, though fair, / To meet your expectations, / Unless you cease to put on airs, / And leave off affectation., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The grocer stands at a counter and holds a knife in his right hand and extends his left hand. A wheel of cheese is on the counter, and there are containers marked "tea," and "gun" behind him. Another barrel is marked "yhyson" [i.e. "physon" or "physan"], and a barrel marked "gin" is on the floor., Text: Grocer, cheese, and butter dealer, / Sausage seller, and corn mealer-- / Liquor mixer, sugar sander; / In Sunday clothes-- great Alexander / Never thought himself so fine, / As you-- ass-headed, VALENTINE!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The man of letters has a rodent's face and tail. He wears knee-breeches, a coat, and cravat. He holds his top hat and a letter in his hands., Text: In a golden lace and fancy plush, / You look finer than your betters, / And take great airs upon yourself, / Since you've grown a man of letters., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man stands behind the counter in a dry-goods shop. He leans forward on his hand and stares intently, with wide eyes, at the women who frequent the store. Signs in front of the counter read "Fancy goods, etc." and "Bargains", and a sign on the wall reads "Goods of all kinds cheap at any price. Give us a call.", Text: You staring, dull-eyed booby, you think you're the dude of the town, / But there is not a girl who see you, but thinks you a boorish clown. / You measure only the cheapest goods, both second-hand and new, / But the cheapest stuff that you handle, is worth much more than you. / With a starvation rate along, behind the counter you strut, / And long your boss will keep you there, of the girls to be the butt., Similar to Comic Valentine 3.2, Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman wearing a apron carries a full tray. "I declare I am quite the Slave of the Ring," reads a speech bubble., Text: You think no doubt you’re quite the style / When you put on that silly smile, / But no one likes such affectation / From one in a servant’s situation / You give yourself too many airs / your proper place should be downstairs / To skim the pot and make the gravy / For after all you’re but a slavey. / To your tea and coffee I don’t incline / So goodbye my waiting Valentine., 145, Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman wears a gown with furbelows and holds her nose up. A peacock stands next to her. The sender rejects the recipient because of her vanity., Text: With head in air, and peacock pride, / So vain and empty, loving show; / On you the gentle name of bride, / I certainly would not bestow., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The woman has a snake's body and a pointed tongue., Text: Deceitful reptile! vain thy every art-- / To captivate my eye, or charm my heart; / For even change your skin, you'd be, at last, / Nought but what now you are-- a snake in the grass., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A frowning woman casts a shadow that resembles the Devil., Text: No meek exterior shall hide / The Pharisaic soul of pride: / Hypocrite -- turn thine eyes within, / Nor longer look abroad for sin., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man driving a carriage and says, " Don't I feel nobby now I keeps my own carriage?" "Nobby" is slang for smart or elegant., Text: They say you feel so proud of heart, / Because you keep a donkey cart; / One thing tho' you should bear in mind, / "Fellow feeling makes us kind," / Therefore you sometimes might change places / With the Donkey in the traces., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman with a long, shaded nose looks in the mirror on a bureau. She wears a dress with a bustle. The image in the mirror has less shading and exaggeration, suggesting that the woman's admiration of herself is deluded. Bustles became popular after 1869., Text: There was never a woman old fashion or ugly, / But what thought she possessed every beauty and grace, / And you're no exception, but as none else can see them, / You're compelled to admire yourself in the glass., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A donkey wears a coat. The sender considers the recipient's attention to dress to be ridiculous., Text: Look Dandy, pray look, / Look at your Brother; / Why should not one Ass, / Look at another., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A coachman wearing a hat and coat with epaulets stands by a carriage and holds a stick. "Monkey's share" can refer to the term monkey's money, meaning payment in kind., Text: Oh, dear me, you think yourself grand, / Standing et my lord’s door with stick in hand, / My lot with you I would not fix, / For the sight of you makes me feel sick, / Bowing here, scraping there / Sometimes you get the Monkey’s share., Cf. Valentine 15.42, Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A coachman wearing a hat and coat with epaulets stands by a carriage and holds a stick. "Monkey's share" can refer to the term monkey's money, meaning payment in kind., Text: Oh, dear me, you think yourself grand, / Standing at my lord’s door with stick in hand, / My lot with you I would not fix, / For the sight of you makes me feel sick, / Bowing here, scraping there / Sometimes you get the Monkey’s share., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman with a hairy face and gap-toothed smile looks at her reflection in a mirror. The sender's parise is ironic., Text: Oh! Thou art my joy and my pride, / So delicate soft is thy skin: / Those blushes, my fair, never hide, / For fain I’d my Valentine win., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A man wearing a coat decorated with braid carries a small animal. The valentine warns that his fancy attire will not attract a mate., Text: I as soon would wed a monkey, / As a saucy swaggering flunkey, / Who fancies that a gaudy coat, / Would make the ladies on him doat; / And thinks fine feathers fine birds make, / Though there he makes a great mistake, / For let his coat be e’er so fine, / No flunkey shall by my Valentine., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman in a bulky coat stands with her hands in her pockets. The sender suggests the sketch presents a a true and less flattering likeness, which ought to correct the recipient's conceited attitude., Text: I send you my dearest a sketch of your Phiz, / Just look in the glass and you’ll find it, / ‘Tis so true you’ll admit ‘tis not meant for a Quiz, / It may cure your conceit, so pray mind it., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman wearing a flowered bonnet holds a fold of her dress in her hand. Her shoes, undergarments and crinoline are visible below her dress., Text: If my passion I ever declare, / Your heart I should like to possess; / But alas! You’ve so little to spare, / All being devoted to dress., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
An elaborately dressed woman holds the folds of her skirt. Her shoes and crinoline are visible beneath the skirt., Text: If my passion I ever declare, / Your heart I should like to possess; / But alas! You’ve so little to spare, / All being devoted to dress., Cf. Valentines 15.13, 15.15, 15.16., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman with an elaborate hairstyle carries a parasol. In the other hand, she holds her voluminous skirt. Her petticoat and the tassles on her boots are visible beneath her skirt., Text: If my passion I ever declare, / Your heart I should like to possess; / But alas! You’ve so little to spare, / All being devoted to dress., Cf. Valentines 15.13, 15.14, 15.16., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman carrying a parasol walkes by an enclosed garden. She is holding the front of her skirt up to reveal lacy undergarment beneath it., Text: If my passion I ever declare, / Your heart I should like to possess; / But alas! You’ve so little to spare, / All being devoted to dress., Cf. Valentines 15.13, 15.14, 15.15., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A girl stands with her hands on her hips. Her face is covered in bandages. The valentine suggests the injuries might be self-inflicted., Text: Pray tell me, miss, how came you by them? / Are they cuts or scratches? / Or are they beauty-spots—good gracious! / All those awful patches?, "392", Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A boy wearing a cap and short jacket is smoking. He stands in front of a house. His toes are turned in and his elbows stick out. The valentine criticizes the recipient for smoking and having a ridiculous appearance., Text: Pug-nosed smoking boy, look here, / How quaint your visage, and how queer, / With turned in knees, and turned in toes, / Rach little boy cries “There he goes.” / And so you may, my little man, / Try all you think, do all you can / Mixture of man, and boy, and swine, / Now don’t you think you look divine?, Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A teamster is seated on his box and holds the reins and a whip. He is smoking a pipe. The valentine accuses him of being overly reckless., Text: As a teamster you’re putting yourself on such a high air, / You are a team in yourself, and a donkey to spare; / Like a show-man’s vain monkey you sit on the seat, / And run smash and bang ‘gainst all things on the street; / A team of blind horses could better go through / And come off more safe from a smash-up than you., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A man with muttonchops looks in a mirror and sees a donkey., Text: Who foolishly regards himself / A handsome man, / Take yonder mirror off the shelf, / And admire your portrait if you can., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A fashionably dressed man holds a cane and smokes a cigar. His bulging midsection and puffy face underscore the text's suggestion that as a "Bloat" and "Wind-bag" he lacks substance., Text: You swagger round, you Wind-bag, / As if you owned the Earth, / But your would-be lordly bearing / Awakens only mirth. / No man who comes across you / Ever fails at once to note, / That in spite of all your blather, / You are just a great big Bloat., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A coachman sits on his box. He wear a feathered top-hat, an elaborate buttoned coat, and mutton-chops. The valentine suggests that no one will take his pretension seriously., Text: What an arrogant air, / What a cockneyfied stare / You try to put on, you comical monkey! / Can it be you expect / Anyone to respect / Such a paltry, contemptible flunkey?, Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman in a low-cut gown looks in the mirror. Her cheeks have rouge on them, and she holds a pot. Another woman stands behind her., Text: THE glass grows hateful to your sight, / For it tells you truly you're a perfect fright; / All the arts that ever you can make or try, / Will fail to add lustre to your eye. / In vain you may try with pastes and cream, / To smooth your skin or hide its seams; / Old maid, with all the art of borrowed charms, / You cannot catch a young man in your arms., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A soldier smokes a pipe. He holds a gun and rucksack. The valentine mocks his appearance and unwarrented vanity. L. Prang & Co. first appeared in the Boston city directory in 1863., Text: You don't look handsome in your regimentals, / Although your doubtless think you're very fine. / You'll ne'er belong unto the sentimentals, / And ne'er can hope to be my valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The conceited woman wears a large skirt with furbelows and a crinoline. Her face is obscured by a purple wide-brimmed hat, and her nose is upturned. She extends her left hand., Text: There we see an old ewe, yet more like a ram, / Though a fifty-year old, she's dressed like a lamb / Both toothless and ugly, and snuffy and base, / Yet she tries to look sheepish, and soft in the face. / Dress on, mother Hecate your Stiff Crinoline / Floats flauntingly freely, abroad in the wind, / But the looks you give, and the fashions you wear, / Bids all of good sense and of manners beware., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The housemaid looks in the mirror and ties her bonnet. Her crinoline is visible through the skirt she wears, and a broom rests against a bureau. The maid probably wears her mistress's clothing. The valentine satirizes the house maid's vanity., Text: O, my missus! don't I beat her? / Ain't the pink upon me sweeter? / I should sit upon the sophy, / And Missus Jones should make the coffee., Cf. 2.13., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier cocks his head. He has long mutton chops and carries a sword., Text: Wherefore with hat cocked on one side defiantly, / Smile so complacent, and swaggering stride, / Passing civilians with scornfulness giantly, / Haunt you the streets in your hairy-faced pride? / Doubtless you think there's a wonderful charm in / Your sword and your spurs and your jaunty chapeau, / But not to kill ladies our heroes are arming, / "Eyes right!" my dear fellow, and charge on the foe., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The Union officer stands with his feet crossed and his hand on his hip. He holds one of his mutton chops, which are long and curled., Text: Oh, gallient officer, / With air so complacent, / With whiskers a la mutton chop, / And general [air] so dacent [missing word]-- / I'm sure I could not wed with thee, / For I'd never do my duty; / What could I do the live-long day, / But gaze upon thy beauty?, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman holds out her infant and smiles. The infant holds a knife and a doll., Text: From early dawn, you love to walk, / And play, and prattle baby talk; / You think that never other lady, / Had half so nice a little baby., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The shop-girl walks holding up her skirt so that it reveals her crinoline. A man watches her and holds his hand to his face., Text: How gracelessly you move along / Like tun-dish upside down! / Pray, stay at home when streets are throng, / Lest some ungallant clown / Might tread upon that wondrous skirt / That sweeps from curb to wall, / And say: 'twas only right a flirt / From pride should have a fall., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier holds his sword out of its scabbard, and a cannonball smokes near his feet. "Bobadil" means braggart and refers to Captain Bobadil in Jonson's "Everyman in his humor.", Text: All hail thou most terrific-looking fellow, / If hair and bravery now were always twins, / Or those fought hardest who the loudest bellow, / Thou wert the pluckiest of paladins. / But 'tis not so; vainglorious boast and bluster / Are oft assumed to hide a trembling heart, / The quiet men, where serried squadrons muster, / Enact, mid tired and blood, the manliest part., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector., Provenance: Jonson, Ben, 1572-1637. Everyman in his humour.
A man is a bird, and a woman is a fish. He opens his beak over her head. The valentine mocks the recipient for trying to marry a younger woman., Text: No fool like an old fool. O! for shame; / Pretending to feel love's hold flame; / The ladies laugh at your ogling eyes, / And shut their ears to your pumped up sighs., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman wears a bonnet, shawl, and a dress mended with patches. She holds a small parasol., Text: 'Tis not very handy -- of that I am sure-- / To feel what you want -- to know you are poor; / But when poverty aims airs of pride to attempt, / It only can merit our deepest contempt., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman in an elaborate outfit smiles and puts one hand on her hip. Her smile reveals gaps in her teeth. The valentien suggests she has an inlfated opinion of herself., Text: In cheap, dinky togs, which you think very fine, / You try every Sunday to cut a big shine; / Of style or of beauty you’ve nothing to speak, / But you make up your shortage with plenty of cheek. / Perhaps you imagine that people you meet / Don’t know what you are as you walk down the street; / If so, you’re in error to think them so green, / For you’re known for a Shop Girl as soon as you’re seen., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
Two moustached men are shown with identical top hats, canes, and cigars. The man on the left is how he sees himself, the man on the right is how others see him. The text suggests that by drawing attention to himself with fine clothes, he seems even more ridiculous., Text: Upon the left we here portry / The way you think you look, you jay, / While there is shown upon the right / Your aspect in the public's sight. / You see the difference is not small / And if you'd any sense at all, / You would be careful not to wear / So pompous and absurd an air., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman with elaborately done hair stands behind a counter. The counter and the shelf behind her are covered with pastries and other delicacies and she holds a glass in her hand. The text implies that both she and the customers she serves have inflated opinions of themselves, and that she will be unsuccessful in finding a husband through overt flirting with customers., Text: You, no doubt, think you're very fine, / As you hand the swells a glass of wine, / Your hair done in the fashion, with curls hung down your back, / I'm sure you're boldness would not the courage lack, / To ask some one to take you to be their Valentine, / But stick to your refreshment stall for you never will be mine., Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A woman with elaborately done hair stands behind a counter. The counter and the shelf behind her are covered with pastries and other delicacies and she holds a glass in her hand. The text implies that both she and the customers she serves have inflated opinions of themselves, and that she will be unsuccessful in finding a husband through overt flirting with customers., Text: You, no doubt, think you're very fine, / As you hand the swells a glass of wine, / Your hair done in the fashion, with curls hung down your back, / I'm sure you're boldness would not the courage lack, / To ask some one to take you to be their Valentine, / But stick to your refreshment stall for you never will be mine., See similar print, "You, no doubt,", Comic Valentines, 17.11, Provenance: Helfand, William H..
A large soldier wears a large plumed hat and a blue jacket decorated with flowers and a sash. He carries a sword., Text: What man is he that loveth not renown; / Out on him for a booby or a clown! / Fortune and women love the soldier brave, / But love not him who'd be a willing slave. / For me thou art the man brave soldier mine, / And I accept thee for my Valentine., "104", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The soldier stands in front of a cannon and wears a gray Confederate uniform. Vanity and inaction effeminize him. L. Prang & Co. first appeared in the Boston city directory for 1863., Text: As you stand there so quietly, in repose, / No doubt you think that you are very fine. / You'd rather slaughter ladies' hearts than foes. / I'd hate to love so vain a Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
"Bridget" looks at herself in the mirror glass. She wears a bonnet and large skirt with the crinoline visible. A broom stands rests on the dresser in front of her. Honiton refers to an expensive English lace company. Brass here means brazenness or impudence, and the valentine condemns her pretensions., Text: Bridget, sometimes, at the glass, / Tries Miss Julia's bonnet on;/ Making, thus, a face of brass, / Edged with lace of Honiton., Cf. 5.7., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man has very long mutton chops and a moustache., Text: You think your style is just the thing / To raise a great commotion; / Get the ladies on a string, / And use them to your notion; / But ladies cannot stomach now, / Such senseless-headed noodles, / They all with one accord avow, / They find more sense in poodles., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
