A sailor stands with his eyes closed and his hand in his pocket., Text: You're a sweet looking sailor boy, gallant and bold, / But I'm afraid that for rum you do spend all your gold; / So take my advice, and at once change your tack, / Or your own Valentine will soon give you the sack. / Your nose does proclaim you a regular bloat, / And an odor most poisonous comes from your throat., "529", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man stands next to a small dog and smokes a cigarette. The sender implies that the recipient misrepresents his background., Text: Oh my! what airs aristocratic! / "First Fam."--ahem! -- a noble scion! / You date your birth high up (an attic); / Come, come, such game as this don't try on., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The tinner sits in front his workbench and wears a jug on his head. A pair of large shears rests behind him, and there is a small furnace in front of him. The border features a woman embracing a man; the pair resemble Commedia dell'arte characters. At the bottom is a pack of matches marked "Lucifer's matches.", Text: Clock, clack, among the tin / Worketh the jolly tinner, / Who at his trade doth make a din / And also make a dinner., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The first line quotes from Charles Carroll Sawyer's sentimental Civil War ballad, "When this cruel war is over." The valentine shows a Union soldier lighting his cigarette from a bomb as bombs fly in the background behind him. The border shows cupids and hearts; one cupid shoots a heart out of a thimble cannon labeled "Love"; another cupid travels with a heart in a hot-air balloon; and another cupid hammers at a cracked heart below a heart on a fishhook labeled "Caught." The valentine satirizes the purported bravery of the volunteers by showing them as foolish., Text: "When this cruel war is over," And our noble Volunteers / home return to live in clover / Shan't we have good times, my dears? Honor to the heroes, who by / Their brave deeds us captivate, / Thank of all the kisses ruby / That upon their coming wait!, Variant of Valentine 2.8 and Valentine 2.9., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector., Provenance: Sawyer, Charles Carroll, b. 1833. When this cruel war is over.
The woman's walking dress reveals her legs and her crinoline. "Sonsie" is slang for "comely.", Text: Clear the track and let me pass, / Boots and hoops, / Am I not a sonsie lass, / One who troops? Ho! my coat of lion skin / Never droops-- / Nor my buttons, nor my chin. / With ribbon loops., Cf.1.39., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
Her crinoline pulls up the fabric of the Irish domestic's dress as she leans forward and reveals her legs and behind. The verse shames the biddy for her immodesty and does not blame the men watching., Text: An! biddy, dear, do cease to scrub, / And mount a box, bench, chair or tub, / For while you're dusting off the blind, / The boys are peeping up behind., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man with a goose's head holds a needle and a piece of fabric. Behind him is a sign that reads "P.G. Goose/ F[as]hion Tailor." "Goose" refers to a tailor's iron., Text: When I look in the glass, / Or I look in my ledger, / I see nothing but "bill"-- / No chink for a pledger; / Sciss, sciss, I will, / Stuff and pad you till / You attend to my long bill; / Confound you, pay your bill -- / P.G. Goose must have a bank bill., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman hunches forward and wears a dress with a low neckline and furbelows. The valentine satirizes women who are too bold in their affections., Text: O! quite too willing; pray excuse me; / I had rather not, my dear: / Your love, too ardent, might confuse me; / Wait, perhaps I may next year., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The valentine shows a tall woman in the foreground and a shorter woman in the background., Text: Dear Madam, I must vainly try / From your lengthened form to fly -- / To share that tender heart I pine / And fly to thee, my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The Union solider aims a gun towards the viewer. A speech bubble reads "Who goes there?" A yellow snake labeled "copperhead" lays around his feet. Copperhead refers to northern sympathizers with Secession. "Anathema Marantha" is a biblical curse., Text: Of all things whom honorable men despise, / The meanest is the copperhead and traitor, / Whose presence is a libel on our liberties, / And his thoughts a libel on his Creator. / Anathema Marantha! Let him be accursed: / Let him drink of the poison he distils: / Let him be marked of enemies the worst, / That has brought on the Republic all its ills. / The woman would be branded with ever living shame, / Who, for a Valentine, breathed a copperhead's name., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman holds a pair of breeches, and "I runs wid der sewing machine I does," and "tailoring done" are written behind her., Text: Ah! me, don't you see, I'm sadly in need / Of some one to tinker me with needle and thread? / I've long had my eye on your useful machine -- / Your "Wheeler and Wilson," of course, I mean. / To the end that my clothes shall be in repair, / My oldest breeches I'll permit you to wear, / And never shall grumble, unless you, sweet Miss, / Some other gay Valentine should prefer to kiss., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A sailor rows past a large ship with many male and female civilians on deck. "Tar" is slang for a sailor., Text: Row away, Red, White, and Blue, / Put the vile seceshers through; / Then row back quick, my gallant tar, / To her who waits thee from afar., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier rests on crutches, has his left arm in a sling, and is missing his right hand and left leg. His rucksack is on the crutches. Chickahominy is a Virginia river near where the Battle of Gaines' Mill took place. The valentine has an embossed border., Text: Come up to the bar, old boy-- / Come up to the bar and drink: / Did you leave your leg and arms / On Chickahominy's brink? / There's lots of your sort around-- / Young heroes in a war grown old-- / And out on the niggardly hound / Who'd leave them "out in the cold.", Variant of Valentine 12.30 and Valentine 12.31., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The farmer's wife stands next to a large pig. A butter churn is behind her. The valentine mocks her for being overweight., Text: A charming life is a farmer's life; / And ain't you in luck to be his wife? / He feeds and fats you just like his pig, / And loves as much when you're twice as big., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man with pink skin stands in front of a sign that reads "New York 122 Miles." His shadow looks like a pig., Text: When first you came before my eyes, / I really felt a great surprise, / In fact a puzzle 'twas to me / What animal you e'en could be; / Until at least I found it out-- / A drunken Pig with nasty snout., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
"Dr. Bleedems Office" appears on a sign behind the doctor, who stands holding a three-pronged knife in one hand and a saw in the other. The valentine mocks doctors who use unnecessary procedures to make money., Text: With probe, and saw, and lancet, / With plasters, purges and pukes, / You cut your way to favor / With duchesses and dukes; / But, you may saw into a fortune, / And probe into a mine, / Before I'd see in your ugly phiz / Anything worth this Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The image depicts a man with his forehead labeled "impudence." He wears a necktie, a jacket with tales, and slim trousers. He sucks air out of a yellow bag labeled "gas.", Text: Some are pinched the wind to raise, / But you've enough to blow your praise; / While such a bag of wind you share, / You cannot die for want of air., Cf. 1.29., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The woman bookworker holds a bone folder, a polished bone tool for creasing paper. A stack of papers lies near her hand, and a press is visible in the background. A cover sheet is on the table that reads " Elton's Alnanac [i.e., Almanac]." In the text, "calf" refers to a calf-skin binding., Text: No paper token, "lovely dear," / Could please you half so well, / As the signatures and folios / Of some young and brainless swell,-- / And if the wish'd for hour shall come, / I venture to opine, / You'll have a work full bound in calf, / For your dear Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier holds a gun and sword. Hemp rope was used for hanging, and the sender rejects the recipient by suggesting that he hang himself., Text: You're a gay old Colonel, that's beyond a doubt, / See front your forehead how your eyes bulge out; / With sword and pistol tight within your hand, / You think, no doubt, you look supremely grand; / Around your neck go place thick hempen twine, / And never hope to be my Valentine., "503", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The woman's facial features are asymmetrical, with her eyes on different planes and pointing in different directions. She wears a dress with a red top and yellow skirt, and very large earrings., Text: Eyes not mates, and hair like carrots;/ Nose and chin like any parrots;/ No doubt, you think that face of thine,/ Will charm my heart, my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The man's torso is a barrel of lager that shields him from cupid's arrows. His limbs are covered with armor, and his face is also shaped like a barrel. The border features matches, a heart-shaped beet, and cherubs playing tennis and tug o' war. The label on the matchbox reads "Red-headed matches go off easy," and the beet is marked "D.B." [i.e. "dead beat" or "dead beet"]. "Dutchmen" in the verse may refer to either Dutch or German ("Deutsche") men., Text: Little Cupid, don't be stupid, / Thus your darts to shoot away / At the Dutchmen, for on such men / Lost all your wily play, / As they swagger, full of lager, Up and down the cellar-way., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman stands in front of two men sitting at a table with a plate with two small fish on it. The man on the left holds up two fingers. Behind them is a sign that reads "Boarders will settle every week in advance. Mrs. Gutstarve.", Text: You stingy, shrivel'd, wrinkled, close-skin'd skin-flint, / You advertise for boarders in the papers, / But any man who has any sense or wit, / Can't stand your nasty tricks and capers. / One herring for two men, that is our fare, / And what is left of breakfast, for our dinner, / You think you are making money by your snare, / But you will find that you are the winner., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The shop-girl walks holding up her skirt so that it reveals her crinoline. A man watches her and holds his hand to his face., Text: How gracelessly you move along / Like tun-dish upside down! / Pray, stay at home when streets are throng, / Lest some ungallant clown / Might tread upon that wondrous skirt / That sweeps from curb to wall, / And say: 'twas only right a flirt / From pride should have a fall., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The milkman is seated in a horse-drawn cart with a container of milk in it. He pours something into a pitcher, and the text suggests that the milkman sells chalk and water as milk. Croton Lake housed many of the dairies and ice houses that served New York City., Text: Pure milk I sell from Croton-lake, / As any in the land, sirs; / No stub-tail drug to town I take, / The world can see my cans, sirs. / No doubt your milk is good and pure, / And will no babies slaughter; / Just chalk enough to make you sure / 'Twill hide the Croton water., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man in a sailor's clothing stands by a pile of cannon balls and holds a sword. One meaning of "splice" is to marry, and the sender rejects the recipient. L. Prang & Co. first appeared in the Boston city directory in 1863., Text: My friend, I vow that I'm not over nice, / Yet in a lover I want something fine; / So you and I can never hope to splice, / For you shall never be my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier holds his sword out of its scabbard, and a cannonball smokes near his feet. "Bobadil" means braggart and refers to Captain Bobadil in Jonson's "Everyman in his humor.", Text: All hail thou most terrific-looking fellow, / If hair and bravery now were always twins, / Or those fought hardest who the loudest bellow, / Thou wert the pluckiest of paladins. / But 'tis not so; vainglorious boast and bluster / Are oft assumed to hide a trembling heart, / The quiet men, where serried squadrons muster, / Enact, mid tired and blood, the manliest part., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector., Provenance: Jonson, Ben, 1572-1637. Everyman in his humour.
A man balances on the base of a weather-cock, with his arms and left leg indicating the directions. Birds and builiding spires and roofs are in the background., Text: You quickly turn and cock your nose / To each new breadth of wind that blows; / Your proper place is on a steeple, / Where you would be some use to people., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
The "beauty of Ireland" wears a shawl and a ribbon in her hair, and her dress reveals her chest. She has pointed facial features and smiles. "Mavourneen" is an Irish term for "my darling," and the verse mocks Irish accents., Text: Och, you're a beauty, mavourneen, my darlin'! / That swate Irish brogue, too, as thick as my ar-r-m; / Faith, when I see yez, I cannot help calling, / "St. Patrick presarve me, and kape me from har-r-m!", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A thin woman wears rags and touches a pile of coins on a table., Text: Vain, hoarding miser, worst of all thy kind; / Of females all, least suited to my mind; / No room for other in that heart of thing; / Let filthy lucre be thy Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A bride is depicted as a cat, and the groom as a rat. The bride holds an envelope marked "Mr. & Mrs." Both are dressed formally; he wears a top-hat, and she wears a gown with a hoop skirt and a bonnet. The border features matches, a heart-shaped beet, and cherubs playing tennis and tug o' war. The label on the matchbox reads "Red-headed matches go off easy," and the beet is marked "D.B." [i.e. "dead beat" or "dead beet"]., Text: Pussy, when the rat she catches, / Smooths him down with velvet paw, / Then for change his hide she scratches / With her curved relentless claw. / So it is in wedlock's matches, / Beauty leads us like a straw, / Till she's got us "under hatches" -- / Then look out for Pussy's law!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man has a large stomach, long moustache, and round, porcine features which suggest he is German, in keeping with his taste for lager. He stands in front of a barrel, holding a tankard in one hand and a pastry or roll in the other., Text: You're a regular barrel of Lager, / As plain can be seen by your snout; / And what you would save at the spigot, / At the bung you'd be sure to let out., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A volunteer Union soldier cowers behind his rifle and a bullet is near his head., Text: Oh, why did you ever enlist-- / Oh, why to the wars did you go? / Your mind must have been in a mist, / For surely the danger you know. / The cannon balls fly through the air, / The bullets go whistling by; / And the enemy don't seem to care / If they hit you or not as they fly. / Then come home to arms of your love, / Before by fright you are hairless; / For believe me, my own dearest love, / The Confederates fire too careless., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man has two faces. One is smiling, and the other sticks out his tongue. The side that sticks out his tongue makes a gesture with his fist., Text: Monster of wickeness, deceit and crime, / Thou wretch that glories in all that's vile, / Look on this picture, and there thou'lt see / A double featured knave like thee. / You're lying tongue would disgrace even Satan, / So never presume to the hand of a maiden; / But go to your vile clan, and with them revel, / For rather than wed you, I'd wed the devil., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A simian tailor rides on a goose and holds a pair of scissors. "Goose" refers to a tailor's iron, and "the ninth part of a man" is a derogatory term for tailors, referencing the saying that nine tailors equal one man., Text: I see them coming -- my prophetic muse / Beholds each tailor riding on a goose, / And when in order ranked I see the nine, / I'll thank my stars that I've one Valentine / Romantic Tailor, ninth part of man, / Be all my Valentine a tailor can; / Little than none, is better to endure, / And for a whole one I but want eight more., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
Above his head, the butcher's words appear: "I'll take the last of your 'sacred nine' Mews!!" He holds a meat cleaver and a cat. He stands in front of a butcher's block; sausages and hams hang behind him. He has a large waistline and wears an apron. The valentine mocks butchers' dishonesty, violence, and gluttony., Text: The butcher is a jolly dog, / Gets saucy as he grows fat, / Makes "choice round" of horse's meat, / And "chain sausage" out of cat. / I'd marry a butcher, that I would, / If I could only be sure, / He wouldn't butcher his Valentine / And sell her as sugar cure., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier plays a trumpet., Text: When from that horn sweet music flows, / With full melodious swell; / Then, Trumpeter, upon thy form, / My eyes with rapture dwell. / Thy cheeks so round, thy form so fat, / Thy grand majestic mien; / So fill my heart with rapture, that-- / I'm happy as a queen., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man prays in a church pew. A small devil has his arm around the man. Behind him are two women parishioners., Text: You may sing psalms with sanctimonious face, / And lift your eyes with such a virtuous leer / Who trusts in you will only meet disgrace -- / Disgrace that's everlasting too, I fear. / Hypocrites like rotten fish will shine, / The devil only is your Valentine., "118", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman with a long, shaded nose looks in the mirror on a bureau. She wears a dress with a bustle. The image in the mirror has less shading and exaggeration, suggesting that the woman's admiration of herself is deluded. Bustles became popular after 1869., Text: There was never a woman old fashion or ugly, / But what thought she possessed every beauty and grace, / And you're no exception, but as none else can see them, / You're compelled to admire yourself in the glass., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A singing women stands amid floating bank notes., Text: The silvery notes that from your throat / Flow forth so beautiful and sweet, / Much better are than notes of Banks, / For they cannot be counterfeit., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A tailor sews a pair of breeches. "Goose" refers to a tailor's iron, and "cabbage" refers to the fabric leftover from making a garment. "Ninth part of man" is a derogatory term for tailors, referencing the saying that nine tailors equal one man., Text: You stitching elf, don't talk of wealth, / Go eat your Goose and Cabbage, / When had enough, then take your snuff / Nor think of love and marriage. / Ne'er to a tailor, could I my love resign, / A ninth part of a man is no fit Valentine., Cf. Valentine 11.42., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man pours liquor out of a bottle which is positioned near his groin. The valentine suggests that the recipient's passion is for drinking and not for women. L. Prang & Co. first appeared in the Boston city directory in 1863., Text: Tis evident you're far to [i.e. too] fond of liquor / To have a passion for aught else than wine / I doubt if it or you can run the quicker. / I'll have no tippler for a Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier looks into the firing end of a cannon, and a cannonball lies at his feet. Seeking "the bubble reputation at the cannon's mouth" means to search for military glory and is a reference to Shakespeare's "As You Like It." "Hog in armor" is a term for awkward, clumsy people., Text: Seeking, of course, "the bubble reputation / At the cannon's mouth," / To fight the righteous battles of the nation, / You go South. / Now, prithee, don't mistake your piece's muzzle / Madly, for its breech, / If the two ends should ever prove a puzzle, / Ask which is which! / You look at present like a "hog in armor;" / May you "live and learn," / And having done so, I'll be yours, my charmer, / When you return., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector., Provenance: Shakespeare, William (1564-1616), As you like it.
A tailor sews a pair of breeches. "Goose" refers to a tailor's iron, and "cabbage" refers to the fabric leftover from making a garment. "Ninth part of man" is a derogatory term for tailors, referencing the saying that nine tailors equal one man., Text: You stitching elf, don't talk of wealth, / Go eat your Goose and Cabbage, / When had enough, then take your snuff / Nor think of love and marriage. / Ne'er to a tailor, could I my love resign, / A ninth part of a man is no fit Valentine., Cf. Valentine 11.41., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier holds his hand up and raises his pinky finger. In the background, two women watch him., Text: You are a gallant soldier, / With a splendid figure for parade; / The country is safe in your keeping, / So long as you fight in the shade. / I fancy mysefl your beloved! / Wouldn't you have a jolly good time? / I'd make you stand guard over a cradle, / And do double duty to Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman holds up her skirt revealing her crinoline, or hoop skirt, and petticoats. "Ducky" is a term of endearment, and "timbers" refers to her legs and suggests that they are indelicately large. The sender satirizes the recipient for her immodesty and indelicacy., Text: Hey, ducky dumpling, pray take care, / Your hoops don't give them to much air; / However, cold may be your liver, / Such timbers, ducky, ne'er can shiver., Cf. 5.4, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A woman sits sewing as a small dog looks up at her., Text: My pretty young damsel, my very heart itches / With love for yourself, and I've made up my mind / As I've sat by your side and watched your quick stitches, / To ask you this day to be my Valentine., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man with a donkey's head stands in front of a printing press. Behind him is a sign that reads "The Vicar of Bray! By a Celebrated Composer. E.HAW.EST.", Text: Believe me I have too much pride, / E'er to be a Donkey's Bride. / Girls take no pity on YOUR CASE, / But laugh full in your Asses face: / Tho' some may say that from our sex / Length of years (ears) command respect, / Yet no respect have I for you, / So-- my Composing Stick, Adiea!, Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man sits at a table. His eyes are closed, and he holds a woman's hand., Text: Though you claim to converse with spirits above -- / Supernatural, if not divine, / I think that the one you know most about, / Is the one they call "Spirits of Wine.", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A Union soldier holds a pickaxe and wears a helmet. The valentine mocks his occupation as a miner before the war, and the sender rejects the recipient because of his social status., Text: You belong to the Sappers and Miners, 'tis said, / And you work in the trenches with pickaxe and spade; / An old spade and pitchfork you wielded at home, / And with ash-cart and blind horse the city did roam; / On 'taters and cabbage you daily did dine, / And you'll die in despair if you want to be mine., "517", Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
A man is a bird, and a woman is a fish. He opens his beak over her head. The valentine mocks the recipient for trying to marry a younger woman., Text: No fool like an old fool. O! for shame; / Pretending to feel love's hold flame; / The ladies laugh at your ogling eyes, / And shut their ears to your pumped up sighs., Provenance: McAllister, John A. (John Allister), 1822-1896, collector.
